“Never waste your time explaining to people, who are going to judge you anyway .”
That’s what my mum always told me. But I have always been a people’s pleaser. I want to make them happy all the time by explaining my actions and reactions. But in the long run, it is not helping anyone in the situation…certainly not ME! After all, hypercritical people never mend their ways.
In your life, you will meet so many people who will make comments about your beliefs, hobbies, career, etc. The choice of words they choose are so harsh that you think it is you, who might be wrong, so.. you start thinking again. Caught up in the vicious circle? I am, always.. lol!
Most of the time I think that walking away is the best choice. But my heart screams out in a rebel that I want to answer back. But somebody tell me please..what? at that very second!
Give these a thought for your tranquility
1. Don’t take anything personally
As difficult as it sounds, but don’t do it. We have a habit of taking everything very personally because that’s our nature. Remember, if it is coming from a person who you wouldn’t take advice from then what is the point of being upset. Just shrug it off and spend your energy doing something else.
Remember you are bothering them, that is why they are bothering your serenity.
2. Be grateful
Contemplating all the comments made at you is not always the best thing to do, just smile and let the world wonder why.
Always look at the positive side of the situation. Be grateful, be compassionate. You can always find something to be grateful for. Be happy that you haven’t stooped down to their level of being bitter and judgemental.
3. Show Compassion
A person is never born judgemental, circumstances and situations mould them into a such being. Treat people with kindness and show empathy towards them.
You might be wondering that this isn’t the solution to the problem but trust me, this will solve half your problem. Being nice to somebody who is unkind will certainly evoke their thoughts!
4. Spend time with the ones you love
People who love you will support you in every decision that you make. Spend time, hang around with your true friends. They will neither judge you nor pass nasty comments. Spending time with people that you love not only makes you stress free but gives you positive vibes.
5. Create boundaries
Boundaries are essential. DO NOT give a third chance to someone who has hurt you twice! Differentiate between fake and true friends. Saying no to a dinner party, or going out for coffee might be tricky if you are someone who likes socialising. But it is better not to talk to that person rather spending the entire night thinking about what you should have said.
6. Reframe the situation
Be that person who takes out the good and the positives of a situation. The person will do you no harm if you let it slide by. Try to put their behaviour as a complex maths equation that you solved.
The main key in life is to stay positive and be surrounded by people who give you positivity. Don’t focus on something that brings you down, focus on things and people that matter. Respond calmly and wisely.
BE FIRM on what message you reflect “Please! Don’t Judge me”